I had an affair. I thought it would work out, really I did. I tried to give it my all, but in the end... it all seemed forced, cheap even.
I'm talking to you, wordpress.
I'm back to blogger: the very name reminds me that I am, in fact, a blogger, which is pretty sad and pathetic, but whatever. I'm happy.
SO... I'M GRADUATING SOON!!!
AndImayormaynotfreakoutonaregularbasisandIbetyou'redoingthesamebutlet'signoreitandactlikewearen'tscared.HORRAY!
It's really easy to freak out: my fellow graduates and I have an unending line of questions to pick from. Scary questions, I might add!
"Where will I live? How will I pay for it? Oh, God, am I going to live in my parents' basement for my whole life until they get me an old-step brother and make a movie about my life? Am I going to get a job... WILL IT BE THE RIGHT JOB? What if I don't make enough money and have to get a second job? What if I make too much money and never actually go on the mission field?!"
Ok, maybe the last one is just me.
But perhaps the most haunting of all are, "What if I never accomplish what God designed me for?" and "What if I don't know anything and I am not good enough to accomplish what God has for me?"
Those are the two that really get me.
And then I rest in God. And it's good. And I feel this sense that He is excited. He is proud. HE is going to do stuff and I have no idea what- it's exciting! He is bringing good to me.
It's the same for you. We never know what the future may hold, and seasons of transition can be down right pee-your-pants scary. But Jesus has diapers.
Ok, that might be kind of creepy, but you get the idea. And I'll go work on my metaphors.
God knows wussup. He's going to take care of you. We are never fully equipped, never fully ready- but He is. And that's the point. We can't do it on our own. But if we sit down, listen, and just sit there until we hear from God- we'll be ok. Just do it a lot. Like, listen a whole lot. I think the Bible used the phrase "remain in constant prayer."
...That's a lot of prayer. PTL we have that option to get us through cuz PHEW, That was a close one!
